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6 Hidden pressures Social Media exerts on modern relationships

Eugene Okyere by Eugene Okyere
2 months ago
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6 Hidden pressures Social Media exerts on modern relationships
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Social media has woven itself into the fabric of modern life. Platforms like Instagram, TikTok, and X (formerly Twitter) have evolved beyond mere entertainment; they shape self-perception and interpersonal dynamics, including those between couples.

While these platforms can enhance connections and allow couples to share experiences, they also introduce hidden pressures that can strain even the strongest relationships.

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Pressures Social Media Places on Relationships

1. Constant Comparisons
Couples often showcase curated versions of their lives on social media, highlighting surprise vacations, grand romantic gestures, and flawless selfies. Rarely do they reveal the everyday struggles, disagreements, or financial concerns that characterize real relationships.

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Psychologists warn about the “highlight reel effect.” A 2018 study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that individuals who frequently compared their relationships to others online reported lower satisfaction in their own partnerships. Over time, these comparisons can foster unnecessary dissatisfaction, even in otherwise healthy relationships.

2. Jealousy and Insecurity
Every like, comment, or new follower is visible, and while these interactions may seem innocuous, they can easily trigger feelings of insecurity. Research from the American Psychological Association indicates that monitoring a partner’s social media activity is associated with higher levels of jealousy and mistrust.

A simple “like” on a photo can lead to questions such as, “Why them and not me?” or “What does this mean?” Without trust and open communication, these doubts can escalate into conflict, even when no real threat exists.

3. The Pressure to Perform Publicly
Modern relationships often play out in public spaces, leading couples to feel compelled to post about anniversaries, date nights, or small gestures to “prove” their happiness online. While sharing can be affirming, it can also result in “relationship performance,” where couples focus more on appearances than on the relationship itself.

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A UK survey by Relate, a relationship support charity, found that one in five adults felt pressured to portray their relationships positively on social media, even during difficult times. This pressure can create unnecessary strain when one partner seeks constant public validation.

4. Reduced Quality Time
Social media impacts not only how couples are perceived publicly but also how they spend their private time. Endless scrolling can detract from face-to-face connections. Even when couples are together, their attention is often split between each other and their devices.

A 2016 study published in Computers in Human Behavior introduced the term “phubbing”—partner phone snubbing—to describe moments when individuals prioritize their phones over their partners. The study found that phubbing was strongly linked to lower relationship satisfaction and increased conflict.

5. Managing Boundaries
On the positive side, social media encourages couples to have essential conversations about boundaries. Should you follow ex-partners? Is it appropriate to post personal disputes? How much time online is too much?

Experts suggest that couples who discuss and agree on boundaries tend to feel more secure. Relationship therapist Esther Perel states, “Boundaries are not restrictions; they are agreements that build trust and safety in relationships.” Clear guidelines can help prevent misunderstandings and reduce resentment.

6. Finding Balance Offline
Ultimately, social media itself is not inherently harmful; its impact depends on how couples use it. Those who communicate openly about their habits and prioritize offline connections are better equipped to navigate these pressures. Setting time limits, avoiding phone use during meals or dates, and scheduling device-free time can help protect intimacy.

Research from the University of Kansas shows that couples engaging in meaningful offline activities—such as exercising, cooking, or simply talking without distractions—report higher satisfaction than those who spend more time scrolling together.

At its core, lasting love is built on trust, respect, and presence, not on likes or followers. While social media may amplify pressures, couples can stay focused on what truly matters: the bond they share in real life.

SOURCE: PULSE GHANA

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